If you’re ever lucky enough to find a girl who is a hopeless romantic with a dirty mind, you should hold onto that. Because she’ll be yours at two in the morning and at two in the afternoon the following day. She’ll kiss you where it hurts and until it hurts. And that’s important. Someone who not only knows how to turn you on but also knows how to treat you right is someone worth a little something… and a little more than usual.
IT’S A SEX TOY GIVEAWAY TIME!!!!!!
Okay guys so here’s the deal, you’ve been putting up with all my ToyDirty posts for a while now and it’s time to celebrate.
Each week I’ll be giving away one of these best selling $121 dollar Lelo gigi vibrators along with another smaller prize of your choosing from the picture seen above. The last winner will also get the couple-friendly $188 dollar Lelo ora as well.
If you don’t want to wait you can purchase these on my site ToyDirty right away and they are by far my favorite, most recommended products. You can get any toys for 5% off with discount word “tonight” until the giveaway is over.
Each vibrator is made with body-safe silicone material, comes with a 1-year warranty, is fully rechargeable and has multiple adjustable stimulation settings.
And all you have to do is like or reblog this post as often as your little heart desires to increase your chances. You don’t even need to be following me and a winner will be chosen every Friday until April 11th with a random number generator.
You must be 18 or over to participate and this is in no way affiliated with tumblr.
GOOD LUCK ;)
THE FIRST WINNER’S ITEM HAS BEEN SHIPPED TODAY BUT THERE ARE STILL SIX MORE CHANCES TO WIN, PICKING THE NEXT WINNER THIS COMING WEEKEND SO KEEP LIKING AND/OR REBLOGGING TO INCREASE YOUR CHANCES!!
I used to go to the boys and girls club every day after school. I would go swimming with Erin & she would teach me how to swim under water even though I couldn’t even tread water fully. One night they had a lock in sleepover. Everyone had to bring a sleeping bag and the girls slept on one side of the gymnasium and boys on the other. We all piled into the bathroom and played Bloody Mary before running out into the open field towards our spot on the playground. It was dusk out. Erin tripped over a branch and the branch punctured her foot. She screamed. I turned back and saw the branch and her foot. So I ran for help. The paramedics came and just wrapped her foot up. I guess it wasn’t as bad as we thought. Her mom came to pick us up, pissed she had to leave work early and we were in trouble again. Somehow we convinced her mom to let us stay. We all piled into our sleeping bags next to one another. Shane snuck over to mine and we fell asleep that way until early morning when he crawled back to his and we all went home. I don’t remember seeing Erin as much after that. The last time I really remember her was when her and her new best friend and some dude hunted me down after school with a crowbar to try and jump me. All because her friend shoved me aside to get on the bus and I called her a bitch. That was the first day of my 6th grade year. Her mom made her apologize to me. I just thought about what a bitch she had become and wondered what Shane thought of it.
My childhood friend was this wild girl named Erin. Erin had two brothers, Shane her younger brother and an older one who’s name I’ve since forgotten. I had sleepovers there often, Shane was my first “boyfriend”. I remember her mom had this wild bright red hair that reminded me of Peggy Bundy on that tv sitcom show. She was never really around. One day Erin and I walked to the flee market on military highway. We wanted to look at the smoke shop. They kicked us out. So we went to the pet store next to it & I bought three mice with the money id stolen out my grandmothers purse. We walked back home & when I arrived my nana freaked out about the mice. I was told I had to return them and be home before dark. So I ran all the way back to the flee market taking a short cut through the woods. I tripped and the box of mice flew from my hands and onto the ground, where one mouse inevitably fell to it’s death. I cried. I let the others free and watched the scatter around. Confused. I was just as confused as they were. I walked home and didn’t say anything.
This morning I stared hazily out the window from beneath my blanket mound. It’s cold. I wonder if it has snowed again. Then I wonder why the sun plays tricks making me want to go outside. I think back to childhood. making snow angels in my yard and leaving one everywhere I went. I think of how I’m 27 now and I still leave a mark behind everywhere I go.
I wonder if it’s relevant.
In third grade I started skipping school with my high school aged babysitter. I would leave and head to the school only for us all to meet up. It would be her with two guy friends usually. The first time I was invited I remember how excited I was to do something different that day. Her friends looked at me funny as I walked up & she said “she’s cool, I babysit her”. & I laughed. What babysitter wanted to hangout with the same kid when she wasn’t getting paid. I followed behind them as we walked through Norfolk. We took a shortcut through the bowling alley and dipped behind a neighborhood so we wouldn’t be seen. We finally arrive back to her house where we snuck in the back door. She brought her pet tarantula out & I let it walk across my hands. After a while, everyone wanted to smoke & go to the hide out in the woods behind my house. We jump my fence and head towards our spot. On the way I found a turtle and carried it along a ways. I decided I wouldn’t try to sneak him back home that day. The last time I had, a week later my turtle disappeared and everyone told me I was having turtle soup for dinner. I think papaw just put him back in the woods for me. We shift through some vines before arriving to “the spot”. There was an old trucks seat someone dragged back there, a few beer bottles, a broken tv. Surrounded by trees and vines. Everything was dirty.
We cleaned up the area some and arranged the couch as if we were watching tv. Make believe. I watched the way they interacted some before picking a handful of honeysuckles to eat. We decided to hike further to the duck pond and watch people feed the ducks. I don’t remember much else, except being invited again the next day. So i did. That’s how I missed 54 days of my third grade year.
I’ll never forget the time we all went to a night swimming in the woods. I remember climbing out my bedroom window and walking to the duck pond where the jump off tree was. Only a small handful of people were there. A new face or two. Someone mentioned skinny dipping. I was scared. I wasn’t even developed yet. He teased me about being scared & I stood awkwardly and blushed. I’d seen him so many times before, he always joked around, & I was certain he knew I had a small crush because of the way I’d blush if he whispered gossip and stories in my ears about the others. I always laughed & didn’t care. I felt important. I stood there, I looked down at my feet. I looked at the underwear laid by a rock. I thought of my own white ones with some sort of cute pattern. By this time everyone else was already in the water. the girls kept their underwear and bras on. I didn’t even have a real bra. Just one of those white trainers. The boys had just stripped naked after getting into the water. Finally I pulled my pants down & walked in. I remember how he swam next to me & splashed my face while saying “see this isn’t that bad” I don’t know what I said back. But we tread water for a long time after that, silent, the moon reflected across the entire pond and would catch our eyes periodically. We smiled at one another. He swam closer and I wrapped my hands across my chest. He stopped in front of me briefly, just enough to make final eye contact before swimming to the rest of the group. He climbed the fallen tree & yelled out my name for me to come jump too. I got out of the water and walked home instead. I pushed the trashcan to my window & climbed back in. No one even noticed I had been gone.
sometimes i come home from work, sit on my bed, & fall backwards. i stay in the position a while, counting the dead bugs trapped inside a light fixture. i count the number of wings vs visible legs. i wonder silently about how they became trapped in the first place. i felt as though i could relate. sometimes you stare at the sun too long and you become disoriented. i ask myself if i have been staring at the sun for too long because i have been disoriented for years it seems. in the background i hear the pitter patter of my dogs paws across the hardwood floors. i hear a pan clang in the distance. i feel anxious at the thought of moving to do anything. i continue to lay still. i think about the first time i rode a bike and how scared i was. how my grandfather held the seat from behind walking me with it and suddenly let go. i remember the excitement and the moment i felt like i could fly. i rode my bike for days after that. i remember the smile on both of our faces as i looked back. that memory makes me think of the times i used to jump off the second story roof pretending to fly as a child & how when i finally got caught my grandmother started crying and asking what was wrong with me. i thought children did fearless things. i never understood why she was so freaked out until now. i wish i a child again. fearless. i hear the dog again. i wonder if he has been fed. does he need to go pee? i wonder how quiet the house will stay tonight. i stare into the light more. i count the bugs again, this time three times in a row. twice forward, one, two, three, four, five, six. i breathe in deep. one, two, three, four, five, six, i feel nothing. six, five, four, three, two, one. i breathe in. i hear shifting keys in the door and realize i have only a few second to move before seeing my roommate walk in the door. tick tock. that means a conversation. breathe. i sit up and shut the door. i look back at the light before checking the time. tick tock. tick tock. 15 minutes have passed me by. i should really clean the light fixture out someday.